Dating and Relationships/Black Men -VS- Black Women

Ok, I'm not an expert, I'm single, and I do have an opinion.  There is a lot of "who done it" going around.  Men complain about the "Angry Black Woman" and women complain that "There are no good black men".  Let me start by introducing myself.  I am a 30 year old black woman living in Houston, TX reared in the Midwest.  I was reared by a single mother in E. St. Louis (google it).   I met my biological father when I was 10.  I have been single for the past 6 years, never married and have no children.  I hear everybody complaining about one another but no one is yet to hold themselves accountable.  The problem is not that black women are angry or that there are no good black men.  The problem is many men and women haven't taken the time to be introduced to themselves before they try to be introduced to someone else.  Men and women are out here prematurely dating. When something happens they don't like, they point the finger.  We must be accountable for our own decisions and act accordingly.  Until you know yourself, how in the hell do you expect someone else to know you or even know what you want or don't want.  Introduction to self is a process of maturity.  Maturity is not a number. With maturity comes experience, growth and wisdom.  The three become dynamics of character, life, and future.  We can choose to grow from our experience gaining wisdom to lead us to make a better decision next time or each time (not easy).  I have had some challenging relationships both good and bad.  Maturity taught me to be responsible for my actions and make good decisions based on my experience.  A bad relationship teaches us what we don't want in a man or woman.  So if you keep ending up with people of the same caliber.  You need to look at yourself instead of the other person.  If you have dated so many "angry black women: or "no-good black men" that you are convinced they are all that way, you have submitted your self in a never ending cycle of defeat.  You are dating the same character over and over again.  Its YOU not the whole race of black men and women.  I know, heard about and see wonderful black men and women everyday. Use your experience, past and present to learn about yourself. Be honest with yourself at all times good or bad. Change the things you don't like and elaborate on those you do like. This builds a strong character. Then you can distinguish among the things you like, need, and want in someone else's character.  Dating is a time when both parties are to gain knowledge about each others character, life style, past, and future.  This information is vital to each party.  There is no wrong or right.  It's what is wrong or right for YOU.  If you rush into a relationship be it sexual, committed, steady, or just for fun because you exchange phone numbers.  You are setting your self up for surprise(s). So if you determine you don't like the surprise, guess what, that's the chance you took.  Dating is getting to know a person and is key to finding the right black man or woman that compliments your character.  So no more excuses and finger pointing downing all black women and men.  Be accountable for your actions, who you choose, and when a relationship forms.  Take the time to know yourself then the other person before jumping into a relationship where you have no clue what will be revealed.  Dating allows time for a relationship to grow or not.  If you end up with an angry, nagging, non-submissive, jobless, deadbeat, cheating black man or woman, You chose them.  It's never too late to start making better decisions.